Don’t worry. This won’t be a blow-by-blow of my life this past year.
What I am going to do, though, is revisit a post I made near the beginning of the year. Back in January, I posted my word of the year: Enough.
I wrote about how Jesus was Enough – all sufficient for everything I need or want and so much more in this life.
I wrote that I am enough. That my battles with self-image and depression were overcome by the fact that I am loved and validated through Jesus’ love for me.
I wrote that what I do is enough. Even though I want to do everything and help everyone and make this world better, I know that I can’t. However, the little things that I can do would be enough. Little-by-little, through my actions and through yours, and especially through Jesus, this world would be changed for the better.
And I wrote that what I have was enough. My family, my job, my life was enough. I didn’t need to keep looking for the next great adventure. I would not give up on my dreams, but I would stop looking at what I have now as an obstacle to those dreams.
Then 2016 rolled forward, and I got to see if all those things I said were enough really were enough.
This has been a crazy year – for so many of us, and in so many ways. I won’t go into the politics and world stage events that still leave our heads spinning, but rather I’ll go to the small stage. They you and me stage.
Personally, this year has pushed every envelope when it comes to my four points of what Enough meant to me this year.
On my forth point – that what I have is enough.
My wife and I say that we want to be minimalists. We often talked about how we have “too much stuff” – and even joked about a fire or some natural disaster taking it away from us so we wouldn’t have to deal with it.
And then it was all taken away.
We’re still in the recovery process, half a year later, but we are recovering.
But it was much more than all the “stuff”, it was much of who we are. Or who we thought we were. All our books. Furniture. The “things” that made a cozy home.
It’s sometimes funny the things you miss.
I found myself focusing a lot on those “things” that I no longer have. I didn’t look at what was “enough”.
My family. My job. Jesus.
- My family couldn’t be enough, because they were suffering with me.
- My job certainly wasn’t enough – because it’s “just a job”. Yes, it provided for us so we could recover, but that was “beside the point”.
- And Jesus. Don’t get me started on Jesus – who let this happen. How could he possibly be enough, when he didn’t stop this tragedy from happening.
I was angry, and my depression became overwhelming (already a battle I was barely able to fight before this). I was not enough to handle this.
But, turns out, Jesus really is enough.
Despite my anger, he didn’t respond in anger toward me. Only love. Despite my blaming him, he never countered with excuses or any need to defend himself.
He held me.
He quieted me.
He showed me what his sufficiency really meant.
“Stuff” was just “stuff”. And it can be quickly replaced. Though, sometimes “quickly” is a relative term.
He’s walked with us, and held us, all this time. He didn’t cause the tragedy, but he has proven himself our anchor throughout.
And he has provided for our needs, and he is restoring what we’ve lost.
There are so many who’ve lost much more than we have, who are not restored as quickly. Yet, many times, they have more joy than we’ve had.
I have my family. With them, I am never away from home. They are my home, my joy, my treasure. And they remind me of that every day.
I have my job. An amazing blessing it has proven.
So, at the beginning of this year, I wrote a lot of idyllic thoughts about what was Enough in my life.
And when it came down to it, every one of those thoughts proved themselves to be Enough.
So, now it’s your turn. How has your year been? Struggles you’ve overcome, blessings you weren’t expecting? How crazy has it been, positively or otherwise? I’d love to hear about it.
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