I go back and forth with thoughts on if I should give explanation for the prose below or not. Let me just say that this is an ideal portrait. For me it is real, for so many it is not. There is much we think we understand when it comes to things like depression and the like (or any fear/anxiety – so often we think it irrational), but when I hear the babble that surrounds it I am convinced we still know so little. Especially in the Church. Those who are tormented by this are often told to just think positive, or to find something to snap them out of it. It’s not that simple. So, family is important. Family doesn’t have to be blood, but family should be solid. Even if you don’t understand. Solid. There. No, this isn’t a recipe for guarantees. That’s the point. There aren’t guarantees. There isn’t a magic formula. But, there is always hope. Hope and love can do a great many things. Well, I think I’ve gone and tried to explain too much. Just enjoy the prose.
Grey clouds ripple the sky. Thunder rolls in the distance. Flashes mark their targets in the horizon.
It’s coming. The storm. It’s coming.
My heart beats, and beats, and beats.
The rain drops. Large and furious does it pelt the land and the homes and all that dare to stand and watch.
Hail. Now begins the pounding. Small tick-tick-tick-tick. Then large SMACK! The insidious rhythm drums my brain, my emotions, my fear.
The wind rushes and blows. Trees bend to its will. They snap. They splinter. Debris flies and swirls. Shingles rip from roofs. Gutters twist and fly free.
The wind spins. And spins. And spins.
I hear it coming. The roar. The monstrous roar. The beast comes. It devours all. Nothing can stand.
My soul rages. It threatens to destroy me. Panic. Fear. Confusion. Anguish. Pain.
Where is my God? Why does he leave me in this torment?
I’m not alone. My anchor holds.
A soft touch. A hand on my shoulder, on my cheek. Arms wrapped around me. Strong arms. Solid arms.
Whispers in my ear. It will be all right. It will be all right.
They don’t understand. They don’t need to understand. Love does not come because they understand. Support does not come because they understand.
It is there. Always there. Despite understanding.
Family. Hope. Love. Family.